The Anniversary

of my mother’s death is coming up April 30th. 



It will be six years since she left us.



Six incredibly long, tortuous years.



In which I have suffered more pain, darkness, sadness and numbness



Than I pray will ever happen to me again.



I don’t know how I will celebrate her life.



I don’t know how I will remember her death.



So excuse me if I seem a little strange this upcoming week.



If one moment I’m smiling



And the next, crying.



Or even lost



In the burden of my private sorrow



The heaviness of death

And the inescapable reality that is my loneliness



Which has seamlessly woven itself into

My soul’s fabric leaving me no longer naive to the wiles of life



Scarred but healing

About papillion

Intense Often Moody Transparent Exquisitely sensitive Animated Never satisfied Curious Eternal Romantic Creative Devotedly Christian Encouraging Multi-layered Loving Quick Judge Critical Forever evolving View all posts by papillion

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