There’s a website called Overheard in NY, http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/, and they have some of the funniest stuff on there. Check this:
Fratboy: Fuck the afterlife. I want my 72 virgins now.
-111th & Broadway
Jamaican lady: We don’t fuck for enjoyment, we fuck for love.
Guy on cell: You had sex with my sister!…Well was she any good?…Where the hell did she learn that nifty trick?
Girl #1: They were all wondering why I wasn’t eating, and they kept asking me to eat something, so I just finally had a sandwich to shut them up. So when I went back to the hotel, I threw up.
Girl #2: I totally understand, I would have done the same thing.
-NYSC locker room, 23rd & Park
White girl: There’s really no difference between gay guys and Jewish guys…Just the hat and a little ass-fucking, but other than that they’re pretty much the same.
-184th & Bennett
Girl: I don’t know if it’s an ego thing or what, but Jews really turn me on!
-French Roast Cafe, West 11th Street
Hobo: Help me! I have 9 starving kids at home!
Suit: Yesterday you had 12 starving kids, what happened?
Hobo: That’s right and the 2 of them died in a horrible fire yesterday! Please help me!
Suit: What happened to the 12th?
Hobo: Man, get the fuck outta here, you’re fucking up my rap!
-57th St Station184th & Bennett