i have what some unsympathetic souls
have termed an “addiction” for cereal. i on the other hand know
that i am merely one who enjoys the tastes and textures of those
wholesome grains, dried fruits and chocolate covered frosted sugar
bombs. i shall now relay a recent conversation that i had with
one such soul…
F: “What are you up to?”
Me: “Just finished breakfast”
F: “What did you have for breakfast?
M: “Keeping tabs on me hunh?” (laughter ensues)
F: “Yeah, keep you in check”
Me: “You never got me any cereal (pouting)”
F: “You don’t need it, you fiend”
Me: “Oh you’re so mean! I ask you for one little tiny thing…”
F: “I am not supporting your addiction” (laughter)
Me: “Me? addicted? how can you call one or two bowls of cereal a couple times a week an addiction?”
F: “That’s what you say, for all i know you could be sniffing the cereal box right now”
Me: Peals of laughter
The following is taken from a mystery I’m currently reading by Lynne Murray entitled “At Large”
Black man: “He wanted to make sure there was no cheese in the
dip. He described to me in some detail exactly what would happen
if he ate cheese, and once I’d heard that, I wanted to make sure there wasn’t any cheese in anything that came near him. I mean that apartment only had one bathroom.”
Overhead in da burgh….
Coffee Tree Roasters, Squirrel Hill (note Sq Hill is a predominantly Jewish neighborhood):
Teen Boy: Sam really loves that motorcycle.
Teen Girl: Sam?
Teen Boy: Oh, right: Shmuel.
61 C on the way home
White Man #1: I mean, you know what I mean right?
White Man #2: Fo real though
WMI: Ain’t nothing like a sista
WM1: Sistas, man, sistas is good like that. Gotta have a sista. That’s the real. Mm mm mm!
WM2: yeah, yeah
WMI: Gotta respect a sista. That’s where it’s at
61 A on the way home
White Woman: Dang, it’s all crowded on this bus and s***
Black Woman 1: You know it. And all them book bags, folk be hitting you in the head and don’t even say “excuse me”
Black Woman 2: (laughs) And the bus driver be letting folk on too.
WW: Now you know folk be
getting on the bus and ain’t got no need to. Bus driver be
letting folk on the bus. Ain’t got no manners. Don’t make me have
to get crunk up in heah
BW2: And it’s raining too. Raining inside and out.
BW1: That’s PAT (public transportation for the County)
WW: But you know I’ma be riding it just like that. All those folk getting on the bus. That’s some s***
BW1: That’s the truth
BW2: Can’t even move…
WW: People getting rude on the bus. I’m from Duquesne, I don’t take that s***. I’m from Duquesne. I keep it real!
BW1: unh hunh, keep it real
WW: On my tombstone it’s gonna say, it’s gonna say…she kept it real.