The advisor and I have been emailing about the match.  today’s email read as follows:  

Good, I’m relieved. 
You take the boards next week, right?  That’s your top priority now.
And as soon as we get your score back, you need to rapidly send that
around to all the programs you applied to

How many times have we discussed this?  Of course the Boards are
my top priority.  And I know I need to send my scores out to the
programs I’ve applied to–good grief! 

My first instinct was to bristle up b/c I hate when people constantly tell me what to do–but
then I tried to be reasonable.  I thought, “well, my last email
had a line in it about me not knowing if there was more to be done on
my part and perhaps that was what he was responding to, but (and here
is where my pride kicks in)–I already know this!” 

Why tell me what I already know when it deals with this rather prickly
issue?  So now i’m all upset and feeling like there’s mad pressure
being brought to bear on me.  Good Lord, as if I didn’t already
know what is at stake here??!! Aaargh. 

Makes my tummy get all nervous and my heart beat frantically. 

Honestly, if I get out of this place without an ulcer/chronic
depression/paranoia/low self-esteem/migraines than I’ll be doing

I just have to remember that if God can make something out of nothing
(read Genesis chapter 1) then He can make beauty out of this beast.


About papillion

Intense Often Moody Transparent Exquisitely sensitive Animated Never satisfied Curious Eternal Romantic Creative Devotedly Christian Encouraging Multi-layered Loving Quick Judge Critical Forever evolving View all posts by papillion

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