Delusions of Sanity

“Psych residents are more likely to have delusions of saneness.” –MS

I am at the VA–the only resident on my team.  The other team has two interns.  Why?  Well, at first I had an intern and the other team didn’t have a resident.  It was felt that a team could not be run by only an intern so the two interns were placed together and I was left solo.  This is not bad.  It is good, very very good; especially given that I have personality and ethical clashes w/ the intern who would have been on my team. 

So this AM I get to the VA and there she is (aforementioned intern) asking me for help w/ discharges etc b/c her co-intern is sick.  I help her.  She makes mention of the fact that she knows her co-intern isn’t really sick and it’s not fair that she has to deal w/ the situation by herself.  (The situation is an anxiety ridden, overcompensates w/ condescending, rude, hostile, demanding and micro-managing  new attending on the unit) Later on, I find out that she LEFT the hospital, went home and called in sick!!!  So her Attending thinks she’s sick.  HA! 

Wow.  Hmmm.  Okaaaay.

Don’t even wait for the attending to come in, don’t see any of your patients, but leave w/o telling a soul!  Then don’t call your attending but call an administrator???

This is someone who has done un-professional things before (leaving before her call was over; telling the nurses on the unit who called her that they should call back after ten–when her shift was over; maltreating medical students, coming to my clinic and demanding that I return during my hours to help her w/ admissions and then complaining to my Attending!!!) and is entitled and deceitful!  This is someone whom I believe shouldn’t be anywhere close to patients. 

So, I outed her.  I told her Attending and my Attending that she had been there that morning and didn’t say she was ill, looked healthy and was anxious that her co-intern was not available.

I’ve had enough.  I’ve had enough of this kind of slacking behavior.  I’ve had enough of the cutting corners and making everyone else work for you.  I can’t take it anymore.  If I do it, I’m open to someone outing me–absolutely!  Please do–because it’s easier to stop caring sometimes.  I know.

It’s easier to stop being compassionate, to discharge, to listen w/ half an ear, to leave early and come late–but it’s notRIGHT.  And I’m tired of how all the people who cut corners get away w/ professional murder but the ones who don’t can’t even walk in late w/o being chided.

There’s only so much a person can take and I certainly won’t allow that kind of behavior on my watch.

Am I becoming judgmental, grandiose and bitter?  I hope not.  I pray not.  I just can’t see myself sitting by while my colleagues damage everyone’s reputation.  You don’t get it?  When these people walk around campus w/ these kinds of attitudes they represent us as psychiatry residents.  When they graduate from this program having cheated EVERYONE at least once, they represent our programs.  When they have their own practices, not following EBM, they represent my field in general.

How someone can do these sorts of things and think it’s okay?  Delusions.  Delusions of sanity.

About papillion

Intense Often Moody Transparent Exquisitely sensitive Animated Never satisfied Curious Eternal Romantic Creative Devotedly Christian Encouraging Multi-layered Loving Quick Judge Critical Forever evolving View all posts by papillion

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