Having long liked guys from different ethnicities and on the verge of my 34th yr (anything less than 6 months deserves to be verging) as well as studying for a horrible torturous exam known as Step III, I have decided to take “the plunge”. I tried eharmony.com, chemistry.com, match.com, zoosk.com w/o anything akin to a happy outcome, in fact eharmony.com brought out all kinds of feelings of rejection (checking my match list only to see “closed” stamped over every one was oddly painful). So, now I’m in middle tennessee (always sounds like Middle Earth to me teehee) and I am on interracialdatingcentral.com “where it’s okay to color outside of the lines”.
My free subscription entitles me to a profile, receipt of flirts and emails, IM and the ability to return emails sent to me. I can’t see who has been checking me out, who has favorited me or is interested in me or send emails of my own until I pay. I don’t feel like paying.
So far I’ve received a variety of flirts which is nice – mostly from white guys and hey, isn’t that one of the other ethnicities I like? Yuppers! My first emails were odd – from a guy who commented on the niceness of my “boobs” and another guy whose two word email left MUCH to be desired. Since then, I’ve sent a few flirts of my own, returned some and replied to a few emails.
I got one IM that was slightly off-putting. The guy, Cuban from Miami (ironic), just broke up w/ his Jamaican GF of 5 yrs 2/2 his work hours as a TSA employee. Either he was nervous or desperate b/c his run-on sentences, lack of breath taking and repetitive conversation was highly annoying. And this leads me to an odd point that I have discovered – the guys that I don’t like and who like me, seem to really really like me. What is that? What’s up w/ the guys for whom a mutual attraction exists and also really really like me? It seems that the ones whom I like don’t fancy me with the same ardency as the men whom I don’t fancy. Murphy’s law or Divine Protection?
I was also surprised to find that yahoo chat has an “interracial dating” section! Who knew??? So I’ve been going on there late at night when my saturated brain starts weeping or hollering for release from medical illnesses. They also have “admirers of BBW” which also struck me. I can never figure out if it’s Big Beautiful Women or Big Black Women but in this case, I’ll go w/ the former thought. The guys on the BBW were more lusty in their admiration of my size. It’s slightly perturbing for a guy to immediately demand your size and then write something about how awesome it is that you’re so big. Whoa. That’s odd – and let’s not forget the ones who want to know my bra size!! Yeeeah, BBW chat rooms are slightly scary.
I did have one good conversation t’other night w/ a guy from NC who likes black women (back to Interracial chat rooms). Apparently he was always a “watcher” until sometime in college when he decided to take the plunge. He’s been dating black women ever since — he prefers ’em curvy (and not Beyonce curvy but more like Monique) and dark dark. Interesting.
So he said that he finds black women to be more assertive in their desires which makes a good match for him given that he’s much more laid-back and relaxed. He doesn’t see it as a personal attack on his manhood or annoyance – just a personality difference that vibes with his, who knew? He says he’s become more confident in himself since dating black women and that the only thing intimidating about dating us is the ‘differentness” of coming up to a woman of another ethnicity. It’s an unknown. Nowhere did he mention being scared of rejection b/c he’s white or being put-off by the reactions of her friends. This was good.
I’ve also decided to re-energize my efforts with the men of the Asian persuasion. Frankly, I’ve always fancied Korean men – merely for their looks. Yes, I can be shallow (infrequently). So it’s figure out what my passsword was for AsianFriendFinder.com and see if anything develops. I don’t know if anything will – especially given that that is probably the most difficult connection for a black woman to make…
I haven’t the foggiest if this will take – but I’m willing to try…