Weeping Dream

Standing on the 2nd level of a large building, by a large tall window, w/ a phone that may have had a cord, talking to Ms Salsa.  Then I realized that it was 11:something my time which meant it was midnight:something her time and apologized for keeping her up late.  The stairwell that I am standing on is grand, not curving but still large, white, many steps.

Before hand I was downstairs and there is a large atrium and Ms T has her beautiful apt house on the first floor.  I was down there when this white woman w/ two kids came in and somehow my glasses fell on the ground and the kids almost trampled them.  I said something like “hold on, hold on”  and went to the corner to pick up my glasses (I was on the phone at this time).  I left to go up to the second landing – the stairs had a landing where the window was before you went up to the second floor where there were more apt.  As I’m talking to Ms Salsa the woman downstairs calls me a “trick” and I blurted out “bitch’.

She goes to talk to the manager and the manager proceeds to place a note on Ms T’s door that her rent will be fined will be increased by two percent b/c of the filthy language that I used.  I complained to her that this other woman called me a trick.  She said, “oh, I didn’t know that” but she refused to change it and said “well, you know when I was here I had all my kids running around so I didn’t want anyone saying bad words.”  And I had to walk through the door to where Ms T was sleeping and my old landlady showed up.  I knew she wanted her last month’s rent money.

She was very nice, walking around, talking but I didn’t want her there so eventually I forced the scene to change!  Then I’m in a car w/ someone (my brother?) and I’m pouring out a bowl of cereal b/c I’m hungry and he’s taking me to another one of Ms T’s houses.  It’s night-time.  I remark as he makes the turn into the parking lot where a few fast food restaurants are located “Oh, it smells like the pizza I put in Ms T’s oven and here am I eating cereal!”  And I laugh.

Then we stop in front of the house which has now burned to the ground – completely.  And I realize that it was my pizza that burned down the house.  My brother? has already walked out the car, shutting it behind them and I open the door and just fall out.  Fall onto the asphalt, weeping, silently.  No tears, no sound just overwhelming pain.

Then at some point I realize that I am just dreaming and I start crying and say “I hate you Satan, I hate you with every fiber of my being for that”.  Then I wake up, wake up.

This is the second weeping dream I’ve had in a couple of weeks.  Time’s are tough

About papillion

Intense Often Moody Transparent Exquisitely sensitive Animated Never satisfied Curious Eternal Romantic Creative Devotedly Christian Encouraging Multi-layered Loving Quick Judge Critical Forever evolving View all posts by papillion

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